Indian Americans settled in the “land of opportunities” often have to suppress the urge to be back in India: a place they will always call home. Friends, relatives, familiar surroundings, the place where one grew up, offer a comfort that no other place can match. This, the urge to be back, lingers in the minds of many NRIs, even though only a few actually end up moving.
The reasons why many chose not to move back are many. While those who actually do so may have a different story to tell. But what remains constant is the comparison with “back home” and what it would mean to move back. An example of the same appeared in a post on the Reddit sub /backtoindia, where Non-Resident Indians discuss issues and experiences.
A 37-year-old Indian American, well settled in the United States with a robust net worth of $3 million, sought advice from fellow NRIs or ex-NRIs on what the experience is like. The comment section of the post stood out as it exemplified the opportunities and challenges that lie for NRIs planning a move back to India.
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37-Year-Old NRI from NYC Gets Mixed Response On The Prospect Of Moving Back To India
The Redditor described himself as a 37-year-old Indian American “living in NYC with my wife and our 1-year-old.” The post continues: “I’ve been in the US for over a decade, solved the visa puzzle years ago (US citizen), and through aggressive saving and investing, our net worth is hovering around the $3M USD mark.
“By all metrics, we’ve built a stable, comfortable life in New York,” it continues. “But recently, the pull to go back has shifted from a faint nostalgia to a daily existential crisis.”
“I’m tired of the corporate grind, the isolation of US lifestyle, and watching my aging parents back home through a FaceTime screen. We are seriously planning a permanent move back.
Despite all the urge to do so, the Redditor says he ends up not making the move because, he writes, “the closer we get to pulling the trigger, the more the practical anxiety kicks in.” He then turns to the community seeking advice.
“I’m not looking for financial advice on asset allocation, but I’d love some perspective from anyone who has made the move with a similar profile, or is actively planning it,” he writes. And lists four reasons for the apprehensions, “The Lifestyle Downgrade Shock”, “The Passive Income vs. Inflation Reality” and “The Identity and Guilt Crisis.”
“I want to make this move for family and a slower pace of life, but I’m terrified of romanticizing the homeland and regretting it,” the Redditor writes.
Mixed Perception Of Moving Back To India
In the comments, the community members outlined the potential pros and cons of a move back to India. Some key responses stood out and seemed to relate to people experiencing a similar urge to return. But most seemed to agree that if taking care of ageing parents might be priority, then other issues becomes less of a factor.
“Aging parents are different, but I honestly feel that a lot of NRIs just suffer from a midlife crisis and confuse it with a yearning to go back home,” Reddit user svmk1987 said. “The issue isn’t the place you’re living in; you need to find something better to do with your life, some purpose. Of course, in your case, if you have to take care of your parents, you need to go back.”
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“There are no wrong answers,” wrote a Redditor called charlie8123. “Once you realize that there are many amazing ways to live your life every decision becomes easier. We need to let go of this notion of optimizing life. Make the best choices with the info you have and enjoy the life you make.
“Happiness isn’t a place or even people; it truly is a state of mind (once basic needs are met). We simply complicate it too much to even remotely have the opportunity to thrive.”
A Redditor called amitkoj wrote: “My 1/2 cent: you should consider the decision about how it impacts your family nearly as much as how it impacts you and your parents. You have a child you brought into this world. You have a wife that have followed you wherever. What do they want to do? What’s in their best interest- safety, education etc.? It isn’t and shouldn’t be about you and your parents only.”
