As it is becoming difficult for many Indians to survive in the US due to Trump’s new policies and immigrants crackdown, a Redditor revealed that they spent 11 years in the US and completed two master’s degrees, but still feel their career did not grow the way they expected.
“It took me eleven years in the US, two master’s degrees and a career that quietly sputtered out to realize something basic,” said Indian professional in the Reddit post. However, HT.com cannot independently verify the authenticity of user’s claim.
According to the post, for a long time, they were not afraid of money, moving back logistics, or practical problems, but they were deeply scared of what people would think.
The Redditor further explained that the biggest fear was judgment from relatives and society, and the stories people might spread about their return. The user even started worrying about how others would talk about their situation, even before returning to India. The Redditor later realized something important as they wrote, “I feel foolish /stupid for taking this long to learn it.”
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US visa, job woes: Overthinking even after two master’s degrees
The key realization was that most people are not actually thinking about others, because everyone is focused on their own life problems. They user said people are busy with their own “scoreboards,” bills, stress, and personal worries, not watching someone else’s life closely. They shared that even relatives they feared would judge them would likely forget the situation very quickly, possibly by the same day.
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The person also reflected on past behavior, saying they even cut off good friends because they felt ashamed of their career path. Later, when they met one of those friends again, they realized the friend was not judging them at all, but was only hurt by the disappearance. They described this as breaking a mental illusion, saying, “The courtroom I built in my head did not exist. I was the judge, the jury, and the only executioner.” They concluded that people do not observe or judge others as closely as we fear, and most criticism fades quickly.
Indian man’s decision to move back sparks reactions
The realization made them feel free, because they understood they could restart life without constant fear of opinions. Now, as the user prepare to return to India, they say they plan to stop taking themselves so seriously and live more freely. They added that whatever people think when they arrive will only last a short time, after which everyone returns to their own lives.
Netizens react, share their experiences
The Redditor concluded the post by asking others if they had the same experience of realizing that judgment mostly exists in their own mind. As the post garnered attention, several people reacted and even some opened up about their struggles and journey from US to India.
“Kind of on the same page. Came back after almost 11 years. Landed last week. Struggling emotionally, a lot of disillusionment about life in the US, life in India, and just life as a functioning adult, but doing okay overall so far, considering everything,” one person reacted.
“Common . Our country people live n due by social status .that is why we are obsessed with money n power,” another said.
“Been there, done that. Returned to India a decade ago after living in the US for almost a decade,” a third user shared.
“Not going to lie, judgement exists and it is quite evident. India is a much more hierarchical society than the US. Money talks (or rather screams), power stomps, and judgements linger. They will not be thinking about you all the time but every time they will meet you they will judge you and gauge you where you fit in the hierarchy relative to them. How you deal with them is upto you. One suggestion – Create and craft your own world and protect it,” the user added.
